Bridge of Hope

Lancaster & Chester Counties

Ending and preventing homelessness – one church and one family at a time with the help of trained mentoring groups within congregations.

Bridge of Hope mother reads to her children

Families facing eviction…..Mothers forced to choose between employment and adequate child care…..Women on the run because of domestic violence.

Homeless mothers face complex problems—a lack of basic job skills, very low wages, abandonment, abuse, addiction, and despair.

And yet, the simple message of Jesus is that we can make a difference by our love for those who are hurting. Since 1989, Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties has been helping churches reach out in effective, redeeming ways to single mothers and their children who are homeless or at immediate risk of becoming homeless.

These are stories of single mothers, who with the professional support of Bridge of Hope staff and ongoing friendships of mentors in local congregations, have moved from poverty and homelessness to financial self-sufficiency.

A bridge of strength and empathy-- Bridge of Hope graduate shares about the Alumnae Program

About four years after my graduation from Bridge of Hope, I answered a survey sent to all Bridge of Hope alumnae. In the closing commentary, I emphasized the benefit of networking with and learning from other alumnae. I realized that we as graduates shared a critical turning point in common. It dawned upon me that other women like myself — women who endured struggle and persisted to establish themselves as viable individuals, mothers, and citizens — existed in my county and even in my own neighborhood.

In the 44 months since my first monthly Alumnae meeting in October 2003, I’ve witnessed the awkward beginning, the early development, and what I now deem the adolescent transformation of the group. We’ve come from a room of strangers to a unit of friendship and support. I may be biased, but I see our group’s inviting nature, vulnerability, humility, and mutual respect as cornerstone characteristics that keep us strong.

Rather than becoming static in the close bonds already cemented, the alumnae encourage new members to join us. I see the already attending mothers identify with the obvious concerns written all over new moms’ expressions, like: Will these women look down on me because I am still so close to my Bridge of Hope experience? Do they still face difficulty? I see alumnae embrace new moms, assuring them how the transition to managing our own needs after Bridge of Hope is familiar.

Each alumna answers the concerns of new participants in her own fashion as the character, achieve-ments, and talents of each of us uniquely shines. We stand together as an undeniable spectrum of women yet peers nonetheless by our common experience with Bridge of Hope. An understood respect abides among us regardless of our present socio-economic status. We assess value of one another by the measure of com-fort, friendship, and support we find.

Through regular meetings, annual events, and contact at other times, we each develop a personal comfort level with the group. A closeness and confidence thrives among us and allows us the vulnerability to share our weaknesses, hardships, tears, laughter, joys, strengths, and triumphs. We share a powerful intimacy that affords us personal growth.

The themes, thoughts, and prayers shared at meetings and workshops have inspired transformation and a continued spiritual development. Here, with my sister alumnae, I find a nurturing place to reconnect. Here, in the ongoing ministry of Bridge of Hope, I receive the humanity of others without counting down to when my welcome mat wears out. I learned to trust that people can give or share from a genuine desire for a moment or over a lifetime of moments, and neither gift gives the lesser.

Over the years I learned to deconstruct the walls that kept me isolated and closed to opportunities of love. I learned to accept, respect, and, in humility, to be the woman I am. Here, in the company of peers, I find community and communion.

Danielle Johnson, who wrote this article, graduated in January 1999. She was mentored by Marshallton United Methodist Church.

When my mom started in Bridge of Hope, she wanted to go LPN school. She worked really hard and was away from us a lot. We wanted to see her more, so we started to help her study and quizzed her so she could get ready for her exams. That was a lot of fun and we learned new things.

To celebrate my mom’s graduation we had a nice party. We had family, friends and mentors join us to let mom know how much we care about her and how much we love her. I am so proud of her. She has accomplished a lot.

Now, my mom has a good job and she still works hard, but she has more time to spend with my brother and me. She and I can talk together more now. She is a great cook and can make our meals more often, too.

When my mom was in school, she didn’t have much time for herself and was tired a lot. Now, she can get more rest and enjoy her new job. I wish her the best and I know she will succeed. I love my mom and she inspires me to do my best, too. I know my future is better because she will help me do what I need to do to get the career I want. Thanks, Mom; you are great!

Kimberly, 14, writes this story about her mother, who was mentored by Grace United Methodist Church, Millersville.

My great grandmother once told me that no matter how hard it gets; to believe in God and the sun will always shine tomorrow.

Well, here I was, abandoned by my husband, the only person I trusted and depended on. He left me with a 3-year-old and a 5-month-old, a great house with rent I could not afford, a car with a mind of its own, a part-time job that was not cutting it, and on top of all that I was an emotional wreck. One month, I came up short on rent and was about to be homeless.

I went to Birthright to get diapers, which I did once in awhile. The staff person could tell something was wrong. She told me about Bridge of Hope and four days later I received an application. I read it, and then it sat on the table for about two weeks.

One day I came home from work upset. I just kept thinking “where am I going to go and what am I going to do with my two kids.” I swallowed my pride and called Bridge of Hope.

Okay, I was a real mess. I bawled my eyes out and was so scared. I didn’t know who to trust, but eventually I had a plan and knew God would lead the way.

The night I met my mentors I had knots in my stomach. Questions were going through my head. “What are my mentors going to think of me? That I was a bad mother? That I was worthless? That I can’t handle my responsibilities?” Was I wrong! They welcomed us with open arms and plenty of love.

At the beginning, I felt so overwhelmed. I told my mentors this and they said they would “put me in charge and go at my pace.” It made me feel a lot better. Plus, the kids went to them like they knew them forever.

I moved into my own apartment; it was affordable, cozy, safe, & close to work. I started counseling. One of my mentors was my counselor, so it felt comfortable. I thank her so much, for straightening up the emotional part of my life and helping me rebuild my relationship with my father and my son’s father. I started school to become a dental assistant. Life was finally starting to look good.

One of my problems was budgeting. Once a week I met with a staff person from Bridge of Hope and learned how to budget, separate my needs and wants, and clean up my credit.

I graduated from school, completing that goal, and then, my car broke down. Luckily someone donated a car I was able to receive. Thank you again.

Finding a job as a dental assistant was another obstacle, so I started looking into other fields. Just when I was ready to give up, I was offered two interviews. I chose the better paying job with fewer hours and kept my part-time job as a bus aide. I am still looking for a better paying one. I struggle a little in life, but I have come to realize what needs to be done and now have the skills to do it.

Bridge of Hope has helped me in so many ways. Thank you to everyone and I know my mentors, now my extended family, and I will stay in touch.

The writer of this story graduated from Bridge of Hope in June 2006. She was mentored by a group from First Presbyterian Church of West Chester.

“Since the first day she walked into school, it’s been my dream for Kia to go to college,” says Norma, a 1999 graduate of Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties who works as a certified nursing assistant.

“I didn’t complete high school so it was very important for me to impress upon her, ‘Whatever you do in life you need to complete your education!’ In this day and time it is hard to get a job without a high school diploma. And to pursue your dreams and goals you have to have more education.”

Last fall Norma’s dream came true as Kia joined the rest of the rising freshman class at Oakwood College in Alabama.

“She had first decided on business management, but she has a lot of talents,” says Norma proudly. “She is good in quite a few things!”

Serena Hunter—Norma’s friend and former Bridge of Hope mentor—shares her pride in Kia and her accomplishments. “I’m delighted that she is going to college! Kia has become a nice young lady who carries herself well,” says Serena. “In church one day she shared that Norma told her not to give up on God because he doesn’t give up on us!”

Unfailing support is something Norma says she felt from Serena and her other mentors during her time in the Bridge of Hope program. “The foundation for me was this organization of loving people who weren’t judgmental,” she says. “They reached out to me and accepted me as I was. “That’s what a lot of people are looking for—a church organization where people accept you and love you. A lot of people in this day and time don’t have the closeness of family. That’s what Bridge of Hope gave me and Kia.”

A mother’s loving encouragement and the unfailing support of an extended “family”—for Kia, it’s a winning combination making dreams of a better future come true.

Kia, who is nearing the end of her first year at Oakwood College this spring and made the Honor Role for the first semester, hopes to see her name on the list for the second semester. Norma, her mother, was mentored by 1st Seventh Day Adventist of Coatesville.

I first came to know Bridge of Hope through another housing program run by the YWCA in West Chester. When I applied to Bridge of Hope I had no idea how much it would involve on my part. I was at the point in my life where I needed help and needed to start doing things differently.

Once I had my interview I was reluctant about allowing Bridge of Hope staff in my life, and made a point of showing this. I gave the first Bridge of Hope staff person that I worked with a hard time. I would not let myself open up to her or anyone else on the staff. They were not going to know my business.

Due to my lack of openness, the staff basically told me that I was not being very cooperative, to put it nicely. They needed to know whether or not I really wanted to be in the program, because at this point I was going to be “dropped.” I was not helping my situation with my “none of your business attitude.” At first I pretended not to know what they meant, but eventually I realized I needed to open up.

Another hurdle for me was when the staff suggested that my mentoring group come from my church. I did not want “those people” in my life either. At first I was going to request a group from another church, but the staff explained that this might take longer. So with my jaws tightly clenched, I accepted the group already set up at my church.

My plan was to fake my way through these relationships and just be done with it all. I was a new Christian, so little did I know God had his plans already in motion. I felt so uncomfortable having these people in my personal life. I thought they wouldn't like what they saw. I also was not good at relationships with women and my group consisted of all women.

When the match night came, I was so excited--not! But the evening turned out well. I let everyone know I was not an easy person to get to know. Someone commented, “Well, I am looking forward to getting to know you.” I thought, “Oh, no you’re not. You don't want to know me.” The enemy was working on me I didn't even know it.

I did not look forward to anything that had to do with Monday Bridge of Hope nights or the home visits by staff. I never let people get to close to me, so was certainly not ready to have a stranger visit my home.

During all this, I had to change the Bridge of Hope staff person I worked with. My flags went up! After meeting with staff, I decided I needed to grow up and just be open to everything God had for me. I was blessed twice when the new staff person came into my home. I believe we established a great working relationship. I miss our times together and also miss the first staff person. What good women of God they are.

With the help of Bridge of Hope staff and my mentoring group, I learned that everyone is not out for themselves. These people gave up their time and their lives to help me! I thought, “Why?” They helped because they wanted to. Now I can't wait until I am able to do for others what God has done in me. Thank you God and Bridge of Hope.

This woman and her son were mentored by Living Faith World Outreach Center. She graduated from Bridge of Hope in September 2003. Today she has her own apartment and is doing well in a full-time job, where she refers families in need to Bridge of Hope.

My son and I will be forever grateful to the Bridge of Hope program. These people taught us how to become a unit in our home. We never had that.

Until Bridge of Hope, I never had a place of my own. I lived with my mother with no true intentions on moving and I didn’t know how to budget my money. But life is always changing and in this situation change needed to happen.

I was 28-years-old when my son and I were approaching my mother’s home and saw a note on the door. The note stated that our place was up for sheriff’s sale. It also stated that the landlord hadn’t made mortgage payments for the past six months. That left very little time for my son and I and my mom to find another place to stay. One day as I was paging through the phone book and reached the housing section, I saw Bridge of Hope. It just stood out that day for a reason. My call to the office changed my life. I met with Audrey, the Program Director, who was so kind to me. I had to wait to see whether I was eligible for the program. That was the longest two weeks of my life.

I then began meeting with Lisa, the Family Resource Coordinator, who helped me budget my money. I still keep receipts because of her! Bridge of Hope Nights helped me make time in my busy schedule for myself and my son.

Dot, Bridge of Hope’s Family and Child Specialist, taught me how to raise a child with attention deficit and hyperactive disorder. It’s not easy, but with the school, Dot, and I working together, it changed my son for the better. Thanks to Dot for giving my son a new book each month when she visited. He loves the Amelia Bedelia and Dr. Seuss books.

And last but not least, my mentors and Sarah, my new Bridge of Hope Family Resource Coordinator, taught me how to open up, express myself, and pray with them. I appreciated when I would ask for prayer during her visits and Sarah would put down her paperwork and take time to pray with me. I’ll never forget how prayer helped me through some bad times.

My Bridge of Hope mentors helped me realize all what was possible for my life with prayer, accepting help, being responsible, and continuing to try even when I wanted to give up. They also taught me how to get in tune with my spiritual life. If it weren’t for Christ I don’t know where I would now be, mentally or physically. I’ll be forever grateful to my mentors. God bless you all and thank you Bridge of Hope for giving me a chance to fly.

When I first came to Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties, I was pregnant and had a four-year-old son. I didn’t know where to turn. I had no job, no money, no high school diploma, and didn’t know where I was going to live.

I was referred to Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties through the Lancaster Pregnancy Center where I had had an ultra sound and knew what my choice was. I wanted this baby, but didn’t know how I would do it. I prayed to God for a solution.

I didn’t know much about Bridge of Hope, but read great things about them. I went through many interviews before finding out that I was accepted. I entered the program not knowing what to expect and scared to death.

I had my baby--a healthy baby boy. I found an apartment, studied to earn my GED and got a part-time job.

On match night I met my mentoring group. Probably the scariest part of this relationship is opening your heart to 12 strangers, but it turned out to be the best thing. These people took time out of their busy schedules for me and my children and were there for us anytime for anything, and even just to talk. I have made these women friends for a lifetime. I couldn’t believe how people can really care for who you really are and not for the mistakes you have made.

While in Bridge of Hope, I met with my Family Resource Coordinator weekly. She kept me on the ball. She helped me study for my GED, taught me budgeting, saved the job sections out of newspapers, and even helped me look into going back to school.

I have to admit that being in Bridge of Hope was hard work, but well worth it in the end. I went to monthly Bridge of Hope Nights where the mentoring group and I would get together. We would have different speakers and sometimes play games. It was a great time to keep in touch with everyone.

I recently graduated from Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties. I took a nursing course and now I have a wonderful job, where I am making good money. I just bought my first home and my kids are happy and full of energy. It’s true that God works in mysterious ways. If I can do it, anyone can.

I’m glad I had the opportunity to be in Bridge of Hope, it was the best experience I have ever had. I want to thank all of the staff of Bridge of Hope, my mentoring group, and God, because without any of them I wouldn’t have come this far.

This woman and her two children were mentored by Bethany United Church of Christ, Ephrata. She graduated from Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties in June 2004.

My name is Louise and I have a three-and-a-half-year-old son Matthew. I began my journey with Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties in November 2003.

Five months earlier I had left my alcoholic husband after almost six years of marriage. I felt happy and relieved to be leaving an abusive household yet nervous and unsure of what the future would hold for me and my son. I spent ten months living at Home of the Sparrow, a transitional housing program in West Chester. During this time I became a stronger and more confident woman. Of course the question of when and how I would move out always came up. Everyone wants their independence, but it is a scary feeling when it is the next step.

In January 2004, I was fully accepted into Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties and in February I met my mentors. How quickly this group of strangers became my group of friends. It gives you such a secure feeling to know you have a group of people behind you every step of the way. I got my apartment at the end of April and could not have asked for more. Every piece of furniture and household item was gathered for me. From the beginning, I felt right at home in my new place.

Bridge of Hope’s Family Resource Coordinator visited every two weeks and helped me with my budget. She was great at helping to find phone numbers or information for me, whether I was looking for a new job or legal information. In the end I did not have to change jobs. After talking to my boss, I discovered how valuable I was to her and she offered me more money and hours. It was a relief to stay at the place where I loved working.

All too quickly in my journey with Bridge of Hope, the word “graduation” popped up. It was hard to believe that 17 months had passed. My time with Bridge of Hope was wonderful. I was advised and guided, but most of all I was respected. Nobody looked down on me or pointed a finger at me. It was all about moving on.

It's been two years since I was in a very negative place and in a short time, everything around my son and I has turned positive. I don't have the worry on my shoulders anymore.

Even though I have graduated from Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties, I will continue to see my mentors and be a member of Bridge of Hope’s Alumni Program. It's another step of my journey, but now I know I'll never be alone and everything will be all right.

Louise was mentored by West Chester Christian Church and graduated from Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties in June 2005.

I saw a verse once that said, “When you come to the edge of all the light you have known and step into the darkness of the unknown, you must believe one of two things will happen, either you’ll find solid ground on which to walk or you’ll be taught to fly.” That verse has carried me through one of the hardest times of my life.

As we journey through life, we enter those times when the road gets bumpy, full of rocks and potholes and muddy; and then, we come to the edge of all we know. Standing at the edge, we think, “How in the world am I ever going to do this?” We can step over the edge and indeed find solid ground beneath our feet or be taught to fly, or we might find ourselves treading downhill, down, down…ever deeper into the darkness and at some point, with God’s grace, we find ourselves climbing up towards a glimmer of light.. But it’s possible too, that the solid ground we step upon turns out to be a bridge and we can continue on our way.

Walking on, we meet someone offering to carry our things, someone else hands us lemonade, and a third person steps out of the darkness and offers us a flashlight and extra batteries! As we continue, we meet more people willing to help. The road ahead may be rough and we may come to more edges, but now we can continue refreshed, with a lighter heart, and prepared for what lies ahead--that’s what Bridge of Hope has been to me.

During my time with Bridge of Hope, I had four major surprises. In the beginning, I had a plan. Bridge of Hope was going to help me while I earned a master’s in social work. I found a job with a social service agency, ecstatic at how well my plan was coming along, but to my chagrin, I fell off my “mountain” and into the mud. Instead of school, I found myself being aided through a period of gaining skills (and increasing my income) in the very field I was trying to leave behind, cake decorating. It was then I realized my dream of graduate school would take longer than I expected!

The second surprise was discovering the benefits of budgeting. I now like being able to predict my expenses, avoiding the, “we can’t afford that” reply or worse, grudgingly dishing out the money. And, I like budgeting money for fun things. You see, I’d spent many years with a man who could squeeze a penny thinner than anyone I knew. Learning to budget for me has been freeing!

Thirdly, I was surprised to discover a new talent--an exceptional ability to scrimp and scrounge. Figuring out what I need and how to get it with limited resources is easy. This was a skill I already had. I’m amused to think that while supported by my husband, I was the family spendthrift!

Finally, I’ve been surprised to learn just how terribly hard it is to be continuously receiving. Often, I’ve told myself there needs to be people to receive, so others can give and…this is just for a season. None-the-less, it is very humbling to be so needy, receiving so much and so often.

Now that I’m “on my own,” I’m trying to pursue my dream. I have a new job, working with emotionally disturbed children, and I’m taking classes to make up the credits I’m lacking. The road is longer than I thought, but as I take small, concrete steps I come ever closer to making my dream a reality.

So, here I am--having crossed to the other side, equipped for the rough spots that lie ahead, ever grateful to Bridge of Hope and all the people who have given of their time, money and belongings to make Bridge of Hope happen.

The mother who shared this story graduated in June 2005 after being mentored by Red Run Mennonite Church.

Before Bridge of Hope, my mom and I had to live in my grandparent's moldy basement. All my things started to get moldy and feel damp. We couldn't stay there because it wasn't healthy for us.

My mom got some help from Bridge of Hope, and we moved into a trailer for awhile. I didn't like that because it was small, there wasn't cable, and we couldn't have many personal belongings like my posters that I used to keep on my bedroom walls. Worst of all, my cat, Cody, couldn’t stay in the trailer with us because they didn't allow pets. He stayed with a relative, but I missed him so much.

I was very happy when Bridge of Hope and our mentors helped us to move into our own apartment. It was nice to be able to do what I wanted with my bedroom, and to have Cody back with us.

The mentors were so nice to my mom and me. They invited us to do a lot of things with them, like go out for dinner at restaurants and their homes, and to go to scrap-booking night at their church. It made me feel special that someone cared so much about us.

Bridge of Hope and the mentors helped us to get through a very difficult time, and helped us to feel better about ourselves. My mom and I are very grateful for all of their help.

This girl and her mother were mentored by Concordia Evangelical Lutheran Church, Columbia.

My great grandmother once told me that no matter how hard it gets; to believe in God and the sun will always shine tomorrow.

Well here I was, abandoned by the only person I trusted and depended on. He left me with a 3-year-old and a 5-month-old, a great house with rent I could not afford, a car with a mind of its own, a part-time job that was not cutting it, and on top of all that I was an emotional wreck. One month, I came up short on rent and was about to be homeless.

One day I came home from work upset. I just kept thinking “where am I going to go and what am I going to do with my two kids.” I swallowed my pride and called Bridge of Hope.

Okay, I was a real mess. I bawled my eyes out and was so scared. I didn’t know who to trust, but eventually I had a plan and knew God would lead the way.

One of my problems was budgeting. Once a week I met with a staff person from Bridge of Hope and learned how to budget, separate my needs and wants, and clean up my credit.

I graduated from school, completing that goal, and then, my car broke down. Luckily someone donated a car I was able to receive. Thank you again.

Bridge of Hope has helped me in so many ways. Thank you to everyone and I know my mentors, now my extended family, and I will stay in touch.

The writer of this story graduated from Bridge of Hope in June 2006. She was mentored by a group from First Presbyterian Church of West Chester.

For the graduation party with her mentors, a Bridge of Hope mother wrote the following piece about her “bridge” experience. At the beginning, she shared these definitions:

BRIDGE - a structure carrying a pathway or roadway over a depression or obstacle: a time, place, or means of connection or transition

For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. Then you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you declares the Lord and will bring you back from captivity. Jeremiah 29:11 – 14a

I want to tell you about the structure and adventure of my family’s bridge of hope! At the beginning, the separation between the road I was on and the actual bridge went under immediate construction by the Bridge of Hope staff. They allowed me to bring to them all my problems, cares, concerns and load of burdens. Without any judgment and in a short period of time, they closed this separation.

Due to the problems my family carried, we needed to cross over a strong bridge. The staff put in place 13 support pillars--our Bridge of Hope mentors--to hold up the bridge. Each pillar had some tight bolts that assisted in their support—children of our mentors.

While on the bridge, my family experienced speed bumps. At first I saw them as problems, but then realized God put them there to slow me down so I didn’t get ahead of Him. Throughout our journey, each pillar (mentor) called out to us at different times to make sure we were making it across the bridge.

I realized this bridge was a draw bridge, when I got to the middle and it opened. At this point, I unloaded some of the burdens, problems, situations and even people that were keeping my family and me from reaching the other side of the bridge. When these things drowned in the water below, the bridge closed. As we stepped across to the other side of the bridge, we gained more of what God wanted for us. About three quarters of the way across, some tough decisions came up and yet again the roadway was cleared for us to journey on.

Now as we are about to step off the bridge to a new road, we dare not look back, but remember and are thankful for the Bridge of Hope that carried us. We appreciate all that has been done for us and the prayers each of you offered during our times of need and sorrows. We love you all as our Bridge of Hope family.

What happens next? I am seeking God for direction and I know what He had promised years ago. Some promises he has set forward already and I must remain obedient and follow through with His plan for my life.

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:12-14

This mother, who graduated from Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties in August 2005, was mentored United Methodist Church of West Chester.

I look forward to a promising future, full of hope

After 14 years, my unhealthy marriage ended, leaving me emotionally and financially devastated. I was forced to claim bankruptcy, and moved out of the only home my daughter Sarah could remember. Unable to afford payments, my car was eventually repossessed. I struggled to get back on my feet, but it seemed as though every time I took a step forward, something pulled me two steps back. Reeling from the pain of my lost marriage, I fought to stay afloat. I took a full-time position as a teacher’s aide, rented a small apartment for Sarah and myself, and tried to make ends meet. I knew that to make it on my own, I would need to earn a better income, so I began working toward my degree in special education. I purchased a dilapidated old car, the only one that I could afford with a bankruptcy on my credit history. Inflated car payments and continuous maintenance problems added to my financial burden. Eventually, I couldn’t continue to pay the rent. Sarah and I were forced to leave our apartment. Feeling like a failure, and having nowhere else to go, we moved into my parent’s unfinished basement. I felt utterly lost and alone. Sitting in my parent’s basement, I cried out to God to tell me what I had done to deserve this heartache. Sobbing, I reached for the telephone and dialed a local church. That telephone call would change my life forever.

The pastor led me to a local program that provided transitional housing, and collaborated with Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties. I had never heard of Bridge of Hope, but that name alone made me feel an immediate sense of peace. Meeting with the program director provided the first glimmer of hope that I had had in a long time. She was warm and accepting, and most importantly nonjudgmental. After accepting Sarah and me into the program, she set a date for our match night, where we would meet our nine mentors. I was worried that they might judge me. My fears were soon cast aside, as my daughter and I were greeted by a warm, welcoming group. By the end of the evening, I began to feel that there was hope after all.

It wasn’t long before I found a new apartment, and my mentors rallied around us to help prepare for the move. Unfortunately, the severe mold problems in my parent’s basement had ruined my furniture. Bridge of Hope and my mentors donated furniture to replace the items we had lost. Several of the women helped to clean the apartment before we moved in. When I couldn’t afford a moving van, my mentors provided one, and with the help of my family, my mentors and their families, we moved into our new home.

The support from the mentors didn’t end that day. Many times they would call or send a card, often when I needed it the most. Sarah and I enjoyed dinners with our mentors, and we would sometimes meet to do scrap-booking activities at their church. They generously remembered us on our birthdays and during the holidays, and worked hard to make us feel loved, especially during those times.

Equally as important as our mentors was the Family Resource Coordinator from Bridge of Hope . She became an important part of my journey, as there were many times when she provided me with items that I wouldn’t have thought to ask for, such as an air conditioner and a used car. She also provided us with groceries or gift cards when money was tight. Bridge of Hope eased my transition into self-sufficiency, giving me the priceless gift of self-assurance, security, and most importantly faith.

Now as a graduate of Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties, I look forward to a promising future, full of hope. I still am working to accomplish my goals, but Bridge of Hope has provided me with the foundation to build a strong tomorrow. Through their loving guidance, Sarah and I know that we are never alone, and we have made valuable friendships that will last a lifetime.

The writer of this story was mentored by Concordia Lutheran Church and graduated from Bridge of Hope Lancaster & Chester Counties in August 2004.

I felt such a relief having help to move

When I applied to Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties , I did not have anybody to help me. I was no longer living with my children’s father, so I was left to support my four children--a 6-year-old son and triplets, who were infants at the time. I found a place to live at a shelter, but I knew this was not a long-term solution. I felt like I was going to fall off the face of the earth…how could I take care of myself and the kids?

My experience while in Bridge of Hope was very positive. I met new people from my mentoring group who became my help and support. They would just call to see how I was doing emotionally and if I needed anything. It was nice to know someone was on the other end of the line. We had good times at the Bridge of Hope Nights , too. I was grateful I did not need to cook that night, and it was fun catching up with the whole mentoring group at once.

I believe everything happens for a reason…even though I was overwhelmed when I found out I was pregnant with triplets, I knew God would make a way for me to handle it. My mentors loved my kids and quickly connected with them. When I needed a break they would take the kids and give me an afternoon to run errands or get some rest. They were so willing to help and they are still close with my children.

The one memory about my mentors that I think of the most is the day I finally moved from the shelter to my own place. I had to work that day, but when I arrived at my new apartment my mentors and several of their friends were there moving all my things, unpacking boxes, and taking care of the children. I felt such relief for all that they had done. I had moved several times in my life, but I never had help before. I was so thankful.

While I was in Bridge of Hope, everything changed for the better. My children and I learned to follow a good routine at home and I now feel more capable as a parent.

I completed training and now work as a CNA. At one point, I was concerned I would lose custody of my children, but while I was in the program I was able to get a good job, get my own place, and keep my children. I was given my life back.

As I look back, I do not regret leaving the children’s father. I know now it was the right thing to do. The program really saved me and reminded me that I can provide for my family. Everything is different. I now have happiness that I never had before.

Hilda, who graduated from the program in July 2004, was mentored by St. Leo the Great Roman Catholic Church

My name is Kellie and I have four children. When I was 34 years old, I found out I had breast cancer. I was advised to get a mastectomy and get chemotherapy for six months. This wasn’t the worst thing, although it should have been. The worst thing was that my marriage was a complete nightmare.

On January 3, 2001, I started chemotherapy. Chemotherapy and I didn’t get along too well. I couldn’t eat very much and whenever I did, I threw up.

By the beginning of April, I realized I was dying, not from cancer, but from the monster I had married. My husband wasn’t always the man he turned into and that was the deceiving part, the part that kept me hanging on to hope.

Finally, I lost all hope and realized I had to get my children and myself out of the house. But where does a mother of four children, ages 4, 5, 7, and 14 go with no job, no money and no place to feel safe? I thought I was the worst mother around.

After one terrible night my oldest son said to me, “you either divorce him or I’ll divorce you. Mom, we can’t do this anymore.” That night I promised my two boys, ages 14 and 7, that we going to leave. I just needed a little time to figure out what to do.

The next day, as innocent as a 7-yr-old child can be, my son told his best friend’s mom that we were moving. She was surprised so she mentioned this to me. To my surprise I confided in her and told her the nightmare behind the façade. She then told me about Bridge of Hope. I thought it was too good to be true, but thought what do I have to lose? So I called them, asking for help.

A staff member explained to me that Bridge of Hope is not an emergency program and that my health issues combined with my marriage crisis was a unique situation. They told me that “it’s a long process.” They asked me how I would financially support myself with four children and my health situation. I told them that they were talking to someone who would soon be homeless with four children and I would do whatever it took.

On June 3, 2001, after a terrible incident with my husband, my children and I left our home at 10:30 p.m. on a Sunday night. It was the last week of school and my oldest son had finals the next day. It was the first night of our long journey, but it has been a safe journey to a whole new life.

I never gave up on Bridge of Hope and evidently they never gave up on us. One day after I was living at my mom’s house, they called to say they were accepting me into the program and had found a mentoring group for me. When I hung up the phone and started to cry. My wishes actually were coming true.

My mentors supported me by helping to furnish my house when I finally moved into my own place. They brought meals, helped my children with homework and I even went and picked fresh vegetables from one of their gardens. Much time was spent talking over cups of coffee. One of my mentors was a graduate of Bridge of Hope herself and it was really neat to get to know her since I knew she had “been there” as well. I graduated from Bridge of Hope in August 2003 with my cancer in remission and now I’m working as a certified nursing assistant.

Bridge of Hope was our God-send. They actually helped me hang onto hope and see great things at the end of the road. I will forever be indebted to Bridge of Hope and my mentors.

A lesson I needed to learn in life was that it is okay to ask for help and in some cases absolutely necessary. Bridge of Hope allowed me to ask for help and trust in people again.

Kellie, whose name has been changed, was mentored by Lancaster Friends Meeting and completed Bridge of Hope Lancaster and Chester Counties in 2003.

Opportunity to spread my wings…

Everyone has moments when they are strong and others when they are weak. In difficult times, having a support system is so important. Two years ago I found myself at such a point. As a 21-year-old single mother of a 2-year-old, I was trying to finish nursing school, as well as work. It was at this point, when I didn’t have a strong support system through my family or friends that Bridge of Hope stepped in.

Through a system of financial assistance, emotional support, encouragement and accountability through mentoring, and bi-weekly meetings, I was able to continue working towards my goals. Going to school full-time made it difficult to pay bills, and support me and my son, much less save money. Bridge of Hope offered me rental assistance based on my income verses expenses—as well as, taught me budgeting skills. By applying these principles I was able to plan my bill payments accordingly, as well as start a savings through Bridge of Hope ’s Incentive to Save program—funded by the Connelly Foundation. Each month I put aside a pre-determined amount of money for savings. After a year of successfully making monthly deposits, Bridge of Hope matched the entire amount. The accountability I learned from this experience has helped me to save monthly even after completing this program.

Although accountability is a huge part of Bridge of Hope ’s program, the staff gave me a tremendous amount of independence. I never felt as though I was being looked down on or treated as a child. Being guided and counseled to make the best decisions as my life changed, rather than being told what to do, was invaluable to my self-esteem. I could have felt overwhelmed as I made decisions and paid bills for the first time in my life. However, knowing I had a support system that would not let me “fall flat on my face” gave me the opportunity to spread my wings.

Another aspect of Bridge of Hope that I loved was the monthly meetings with the Dot, the Family and Child Specialist. Her visits to our house would begin with an activity for me and my son, such as playing games, cooking a recipe, making play-dough, etc. My son looked forward to these meetings when he would receive a book to keep. Dot and I would review the goals I had set for my son and for me as a parent. We would also read a chapter from a book and review questions. I really enjoyed learning about children, their development, and their learning styles.

Additionally, the support and encouragement of my mentors has been irreplaceable. I’ve appreciated how they took me and my son into their lives, offering emotional and spiritual support. They will remain lifelong friends that carry a special place in my heart.

I am so grateful to Bridge of Hope for helping me pursue my educational dreams while raising my son. As I complete the program and begin working full-time, I feel so blessed to have had this opportunity and support.

The author of this story, mentored by the Worship Center from Lancaster County , celebrated her graduation from Bridge of Hope in February 2003.

I still have a long way to go

When I first heard about Bridge of Hope I was terrified that I would not have what it takes to complete the program. At the time I was a 30 yr-old-single unemployed mother of five-year-old twins, one boy and one girl. I had become severely depressed and was forced to live with my mom, sharing a room in her attic with my children. We couldn’t live in a shelter forever, so this seemed to be the best option.

My family facilitator from Headstart introduced me to Bridge of Hope . The staff turned out to be the nicest people on earth, so I decided to be open and give it a shot. It was hard admitting I needed help, but I swallowed my pride and did what was best for my children. I do not regret one moment of my time in Bridge of Hope , although sometimes it was a real struggle and I still have trouble asking for help. Finally though, I am at a calm place in my life.

I am still amazed to what extent total strangers went to help me and my children. Twelve of the most beautiful, loving, caring and supportive women and their families, that I thought only existed in dreams, took us into their homes and lives without judgment or pity. At times I can be difficult and not the most open person, but these women hung in with me and gave me love, support, and understanding that to this day I don’t think I will ever get used to.

We are now living in an apartment and I love my full-time job with terrific benefits and plenty of opportunities for promotion. My children are healthy and doing great in school and I am on my way to being healthier and happier. Most important I am gradually learning to trust again and the best part is having at least 20 people (mentors, Bridge of Hope staff, other program people) that I can genuinely call FRIENDS. I don’t know if I can ever fully describe how this feels.

I still have a long way to go, although I do see recovery down the road. I don’t know where I stand in the matters of faith. I am still afraid to go to church, but each night I read a lot of the Bible and pray. For once in my life I am starting to believe that someone out there is listening to me and sometime soon I know I will be ready to take the necessary steps.

I have found that survival is possible with courage and determination as well having the knowledge that someone does believe in you. I thank everyone in Bridge of Hope for the time they spent with me and for the patience and support they have given me.

This article was written by a woman who graduated from Bridge of Hope in October 2002. Her mentoring group was from Grace Lutheran Church, Lancaster , PA.

We have been so truly blessed

Wow! How time flies by. The past 18 months with Bridge of Hope have had such a positive effect on my son’s life and mine.

I came to know about Bridge of Hope through a caseworker from Careerlink. We had just moved from Virginia to Pennsylvania and we were living with my parents. Needless to say that did not work out, so we moved into an inexpensive motel room. What an experience that was. It felt more like we were living out of the trunk of our car, since each morning we packed up our few belongings, unsure how safe they were in the motel room. My son missed his toys, since most of our things were in storage.

All I could think about was why these things were happening to us. Although I had applied to Bridge of Hope , I could not imagine how my life was ever going to improve. I felt skeptical that a mentoring group of people I didn’t even know would be willing to help me. But after Bridge of Hope introduced me to them, I felt like I knew these people and I just needed to get reacquainted with them. It was a perfect match.

These people have committed their time and energy to make sure that our needs are met and that we feel part of each one of their families. When we were ready to move into our new home my mentors were there. (Moving has never been that crazy fun.) When our birthdays came, they were there. When any holiday or “just because” came around, they were there. I was so surprised when they showed up at my house with a Christmas tree and decorations a few days before Thanksgiving. When my car broke down, they connected me with an auto mechanic who volunteered his time. Soon after my temporary job suddenly ended, one mentor referred me to her workplace, where I now work full-time.

My mentors have touched my life at an even deeper level. One day when I lacked all hope and life looked really bleak, my mentors wrapped me in love and pulled me out of that low point.

I believe when something doesn’t go right in your life, God does something or brings someone into your life that always turns out for your good. Things have truly worked out for us. We now have more love floating around than we ever thought possible. We have been so truly blessed by our mentoring group and Bridge of Hope that sometimes it just doesn’t seem real. Together we have created memories that will last us a lifetime. Thanks!

This article was written by a woman mentored by a group from Forks of the Brandywine Presbyterian, the church’s second mentoring group in four years. This woman and her seven-year-old son completed Bridge of Hope in May 2002.

Angels Right Beside Me

It seems that when you think things could not get any worse than they are, someone comes and picks you up and dusts you off and puts you back on your feet again. I left my youngest son’s father over a year ago and had nothing but a little furniture, clothes, myself and my two boys. I moved in with my father, step-mom, and step-sister temporarily. I had no job, no car and no money. That’s when my aunt told me about this program called Bridge of Hope . I contacted them and a few months later, I was accepted into the program. I do not know where I would be without Bridge of Hope and, of course, my mentoring group.

Bridge of Hope gave me the courage to go out and get a job after not working for three years. They helped me to finance a car and also helped me to find the home I live in now, with groceries and so many other things. I cannot even begin to name all the things they helped me with. I would have never been able to afford the place where I am living without them.

The thing that made me the most nervous was meeting my mentoring group, but that should have been the very least of my worries. Wow, I believe I got the best group. (Sorry to all the other moms, just kidding.) It was as if my group was made for me. I never thought I would come to love this group of people the way I have.

As this year has passed, I have established relationships with each and every one of them. They will always hold a special place in my heart. Bridge of Hope Nights were something we all looked forward to. When I was first starting out and had no babysitting available, they all pitched in and babysat until I could work out other arrangements. When Christmas came I was so blessed by my group and by Bridge of Hope . What a wonderful Christmas for my boys and for me. When my car broke down, they lent me a car and fixed my car. When I just needed a willing ear to listen, they were my friends. We all plan to continue the Monday night meetings even though I have finished the program.

And, of course, there was the little problem I had with budgeting money. I was a mess, but with the help of Bridge of Hope , I have finally learned to budget and keep track of my checkbook. Now my bills are paid on time. I am just so blessed. I live in a beautiful place. I own my own car. There is always food for my children. I could never have done any of this without the help of Bridge of Hope . There are so many areas they have helped with. Being a better parent and just a better person.

Now that I am done with the program, I hope that down the road I can be part of a mentoring group for another mom and help her the way I have been helped. God has blessed me with so many guardian angels. I hope that everyone reading this knows that you have angels, too, right there with you. Just look around. Thank you to all my angels.

This article was written by a woman mentored by Old Road Mennonite Church , Gap. She completed Bridge of Hope in April 2002.

A Wonderful Experience and a Blessing

I can’t believe this year is almost over! Last year I was living with my grandmother because I had lost my apartment. When I had my second child, I was receiving child support for both of my children. But then, my baby’s father went to prison so I no longer received child support from him. Within several months my oldest child’s father passed away, which left me without any child support for either of my children. I was not able to keep up with all the payments and bills I had. I lost my car and eventually my apartment. I continued to work through all of this, but was not able to support my children with the wage I was receiving. I was living with my grandmother for two years and was just not able to get back on my feet and on my own.

A year ago I was at a point of giving up when I called Bridge of Hope for help. I found out about Bridge of Hope through a friend at church. I also talked with someone from Maranatha Church who explained more about the program to me and told me what a good program it would be for me and my children. When I met my mentoring group, they were easy to get to know and always fun to talk with. They helped ease my burdens, especially on moving day, when they helped me move into my apartment. They have always made a group effort to get to know me and my children. Their phone calls are an inspiration to me and they always give me the encouragement I need.

My mentors give me the feeling of happiness and love. They have worked with us for the past year and have been there to support me and encourage me. They have helped me gain the confidence to be able to maintain a home for myself and my children.

The staff at Bridge of Hope has worked with me over this past year, too. In what seems like a short amount of time, they have helped me accomplish a lot. They have helped with parenting, budgeting and spiritual issues. They have also helped me clean up my credit report and begin a savings account. Bridge of Hope and my mentors have been a wonderful experience and a blessing to my family.

This 27-year-old woman and her two children will complete Bridge of Hope in March. She is being mentored by Maranatha Evangelistic Temple in Coatesville, PA.

We were a near-perfect fit

Bridge of Hope has changed my life. Not in a big, shocking revelation, but in a quiet, slow and steady awakening. As Monica (not her real name) nears her graduation from Bridge of Hope, I have been thinking about her progress - and realizing my own.

Before I had heard of Bridge of Hope, I wanted to be involved in an outreach program, but was unclear of what it might be. I learned about this wonderful organization a year and a half ago at my church’s Activity Fair. When I first signed up, I was unsure of what to expect. I had been through financial stress and loneliness myself and thought these experiences might help me better understand the single mother and her situation. Most of the people who signed up to form a mentoring group were new or almost new acquaintances to me.

Before our group could mentor, Bridge of Hope held several sessions at our church to explain the process. Each session was geared towards different aspects, giving us a thorough understanding of the process. Once our group decided to mentor, we were matched with Monica and her children, after hearing a description about her and her circumstances.

Monica and our group were a near-perfect fit. Because Bridge of Hope has such a wonderful program for training and preparing mentors, everything has gone fairly smoothly. The staff has been very supportive in leading us through expectations and boundaries, as well as defining and maintaining our roles in the program.

The monthly Monday Night Bridge of Hope meetings have not always been convenient for my schedule, but I leave, always glad that I’d come. At these meetings we are served dinner, prepared by an outside organization or church group, followed by a program that helps us learn more about the mentoring process or how to be a better mentor. Our group has become very close, and along with discussing the designated topic, we also share about our lives with each other and with Monica.

Monica has chosen to attend our church, which is not a requirement of Bridge of Hope. Because of this, I feel that our relationship with her will continue to grow. We have been able to introduce her to other members of the church and to some of our friends who do not attend our church. We have watched her expand her group of friends through contacts at work and at the local YMCA, where she exercises.

Earlier I wrote about the changes in my life. One of the major ones is having learned to accept a total stranger into my life in an unconditional, loving manner. Not only have I been involved with Monica and the group, but my daughter and I have watched Monica’s daughter while she went out with friends or when she had trouble with daycare. Taking her daughter to the zoo last year was one of the best days of my summer.

I also have been able to verify to myself how important it is to allow people to learn and grow at his or her own pace. As one of the other mentors stated, Monica has been like a spring plant that was small at the beginning but has grown, matured and blossomed over time.

Through this experience I have made a difference in two people’s lives – Monica and her daughter’s. In return, they have made a difference in my life and in the life of my daughter. If you are wondering what it might be like to be a mentor, I encourage you to take a chance and let your life be changed, too.

The author of this story, Mercer Roemer, mentored “Monica” through her church, Episcopal Church of the Advent, Kennett Square. “Monica” graduates from Bridge of Hope in June 2003.

Just when you think things are going so great, your world crashes upon you. That is what happened to me. One night I lost my world, or so I thought. The only thing that kept me going was my beautiful little girl, who deserved so much more than I could possibly dream of offering her. I found myself homeless with no money, as I was still on maternity leave. I moved in with a friend and her husband who had recently lost their baby to a brief illness.

One night at work, I met a former friend’s sister whom I hadn’t seen for a long time. She told me what Bridge of Hope had done for her sister and how it might benefit me. Looking back I believe this was God’s way of answering my prayers. At first I kept this advice in the back of my mind as I couldn’t swallow my pride and ask for help.

After several months of living with my friend it became too hard for her to have another baby in her home. I needed to move somewhere else until I had enough money for an apartment. It was then that I swallowed my pride and admitted I needed help. I interviewed with Bridge of Hope and waited their response.

Once accepted, I knew God was listening to me and that I needed someone’s help, guidance, and direction to do all that needed to be done. While my mentoring group was being trained, I met weekly with an inspiring Bridge of Hope staff member who taught me how to budget my money and handle life situations. She was there whenever I needed to talk and greatly impacted my life.

Soon after beginning the program I was matched with a mentoring group of seven women from St. John’s Episcopal Church, Lancaster. Before meeting my mentors, I was a little apprehensive and afraid that this program was a little too invasive for me. I wasn’t sure that I was ready, nor did I know who I was, as I felt as if I had lost my identity. I was matched with seven wonderful women, each with a unique quality that I admired and needed in my life. The match was an instant success.

I never imagined I would become so close to seven strangers so quickly. They taught me so much about myself that I never imagined possible. They welcomed me into their lives and homes; it was as if I had a little family.

The biggest lesson I learned was that it takes a stronger person to realize and ask for help than not to. Also, meeting regularly with Bridge of Hope’s Family & Child Specialist Coordinator taught me how to be a better parent.

I can’t believe it has been a little over a year since I walked through the doors of Bridge of Hope. I never imagined becoming this independent. God has blessed me and my daughter with the opportunity to meet and befriend the staff and mentors of Bridge of Hope. They have taught me so much and also taught me that there is always room to grow through relationships.